3 Essential Guidelines For Co-Parenting

By Jhonrey Rosal


Many parents today find themselves having to cope with co-parenting. Co-parenting is the name for the situation in which parents who aren't in a relationship with each other (and who aren't living together) still work to raise the kids they've had together with each other. Co-parenting can be quite simple and harmonious or a complete nightmare. For most people it falls somewhere between the two extremes. One of the best things you can do as a co-parent is learn a few things that will help you work through everything so that your kids can get through the process without a lot of harm.

Probably the most difficult aspect of co-parenting is how children have to go back and forth between parents from time to time. Do not ask your child questions about what the other parent is doing right after they come home from a visit. It's fine if the child wants to discuss certain things with you. Even though you're curious, child interrogations are not recommended. Another thing you shouldn't do is send your kids to the ex-spouse's home with messages. Be an adult and call the other parent if you want to talk. It is never a good idea to get the kids in the middle of any of these issues.

In a co-parenting situation, how much contact should you maintain with your ex-spouse? There is no hard-line rule double parents must follow. You need to evaluate what to do based upon the relationship that both of you have. For instance, if you always argue when you see each other, as little contact as possible is recommended. On the other hand, it's much better if you can at least talk civilly about issue that relate to your kids. When you do co-parenting, there is really no way to get rid of the other person in this relationship. So it's best if you can get to the point where you can have reasonable conversations with them. If you really must talk with each other, and it's never nice, conversations straight and to the point.

If you want to avoid arguments when doing co-parenting, you should always plan things out in a feasible manner. In some cases, parents and up in court, and they have to follow certain orders by the judge. Mediators are a great choice, especially when court is not an option, and you just need a workable plan to utilize. Related issues regarding child raising, as well as a schedule that both parents should follow, should be arranged by the mediator. Whenever a schedule is not in place, that both parents have to adhere to, conflict will definitely arise. To avoid conflicts from happening, you need to have everything in written form so there are no questions as to what must be done.

If you do have to see and talk with your co-parent during these times, try to keep everything as casual as possible and work hard to not get into an argument. If you have any serious matters or disagreements, it's best to save them for when the kids aren't around. There isn't just one way to be a co-parent; you are going to have to figure out how to work things out properly for yourselves. At the same time, you will be able to use these tips to hopefully avoid some of the major problems that come up between people who are trying to co-parent. Regardless of everything else, what matters here isn't winning a battle with your co-parent, it is ensuring that you are honestly doing whatever is best for your children.




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